A letter to Target.

Dear Target.com online registry help line,

You suck.

Like… a lot.

I love Target. Like REALLY LOVE IT. But your sheer stupidity has done nothing but turn me off to the BULLSEYE charm. For shame…

flickr: kyleboy668 Creative Commons

I know that all issues with Target.com might not be the easiest to fix, but at least have enough brain cells to UNDERSTAND a complaint enough that you might be able to provide SOME KIND OF ANSWER to a customer in need. For example:

I haven’t been able to log into my baby registry for about a month. This doesn’t make me a happy camper. I can view it just fine… it’s there, it exists, friends and family have been able to shop from it, but I can’t log in to manage the darn thing. I tried a number of different passwords and email addresses and nothing worked. When I tried to re-set my password using the HIGHLY RECOMMENDED “forgot your password?” button, I got a pop-up telling me, “We have sent a password change link to your email address”. False Target.com… NO EMAIL!

No email in my inbox.

No email in my trash.

No email in my spam folder.


And it’s not that I wasn’t patient enough to wait for it to get sent. I waited and waited. Then I tried again and waited and waited… nothing!

Seems strange, eh? The website could recognize my email address enough to tell me that something had been sent {it even was smart enough to tell me that an alternative email address was not valid in the system}. However, according to your idiot-brained “help staff”, I don’t even exist in the Target online system. Never have. Awesome.

Not only that… your brilliant “customer service experts” couldn’t even find my registry. Anywhere. They searched by my name, {which I had to spell out about 6 times} they searched by my state, by my billing address, even by my baby’s name… nothing. The funny thing is, I was looking right at my registry. Open… right there on the computer screen, complete with all the items I registered for, my name, city and state. And these geniuses couldn’t FIND my registry in the system.  Then they asked me for my registry ID number and I just had to laugh. The registry ID number which is displayed on the upper right hand of your registry… WHEN YOU ARE LOGGED IN TO MANAGE IT.  Seriously?

Now, let me back track for a moment… You may notice that I have been saying “they” and “experts” and “idiots”. In case it’s a little too early to comprehend what the plural form of a noun represents, allow me to enlighten you. I not only spoke to one idiot, I spoke to two! Count em’, TWO morons! Two people who could not find my existence on the system. Two people who didn’t believe me every time I told them I had already tried to reset my password. Two people who didn’t believe me when I said that I was looking at my registry because, according to them, I didn’t exist. Two people who seemed to know fewer words in the English language than my unborn baby.  TWO!

The first one, after giving me the run around and providing ZERO help for a full 15 minutes {unless you count her telling me that I might want to create a new account instead of finding a way to get access to the old one}, told me that she would transfer me to another department who could be of better service. Oh Joy.  What she meant was, “I think you might really blow up on me soon so I’m going to make you go through the whole process again and hope that you end up talking to someone else who will probably have the same bone-headed answers as I do”. So, I was sent back to the main phone menu, chose the same options that I did before and was placed with idiot numero dos. This genius ran me through the same exact questions and got the same exact results. Even after I told him what the previous lady had done in her attempts to help me, he continued with his little check list and did the exact same things.

ANOTHER 15 minutes later, with zero progression {except for a heightened rage in the heart of yours truly} idiot numero dos tells me that he is going to send my problem to the big wigs to try to get it fixed. It’s not something I sit on the phone and talk through again, it’s a report he files letting the SUPER HEROES of Target.com know there is an issue to solve. Hooray. That means I’ll probably have already had the baby before I get any kind of response.

Then, as the cherry on top, he tells me this, “Well ma’am, because Target.com has been going through some internal changes and re-routing, your account may have been reset.”


Smart guy knew full and well that there had been internal changes happening on the back-end of the website, and still spend 15 minutes trying to convince me that my account never existed??? Brilliant.

Eff you and your big-wig report.

In conclusion, please shut down your call-center services until you find some competent “customer service experts” to do the job. It will save the world from endless frustration, confusion and deep-pitted anger, and will also save many lives… mainly the lives of the customer service staff because no one else will have a reason to want to run them over with a Hum-V.

I still love Target, and will continue to visit, browse and spend way too much money. Just know that I hope to NEVER have to call the help line ever again.

Thanks a bunch!

Sara {S as in SNAKE, A as in APPLE, R as in Robert, A as in Apple} iampregnantandwillripyourfaceoff Pierce .


*** Let it be known that I still LOVE Target as a company very much. My main issue here revolves around the over all ‘help line’ experience of so many companies. Customers rely on ‘help lines’ to… HELP them and more times than not the people manning the phones are incompetent, hard to understand and only add to the problem. Call me crazy but if I had a company ‘help line’ I would make sure it was staffed with people who not only knew what they were doing, but could be clearly understood and wouldn’t lead me on for 20 minutes just to tell me that the problem is beyond their control. 🙂 LOVE YOU TARGET!!!

2 thoughts on “A letter to Target.

  1. Sara, I am so sorry for the experience you have had with Target.com. As a manager for the Target in Christiansburg, please know that although we share common goals, Target and Target.com are managed separately. From what I have learned, Target.com has had recent issues with not only their registry but also their online site in general. I know this is no help to you with a little Keelin ready to make her big debut but I do hope that they will be able to resolve this soon. If you need to make changes to your registry, you can do it from inside the store. If you print your registry and take it to Guest Services you can use the scanner they give you to add items, delete items, or change the quantity. I hope this helps a little… If I hear anything else concerning the status of the site I will pass it on to you! I hate when guests have a less than exceptional experience with Target and especially when that guest is someone I care about like a certain Sara (S as in Sweet, A as in Awesome, R as in Remarkable, and A as in Ambitious).
    Please let me know if there is anything else with which I can help!! =)


    • Aw, thanks Jennifer.
      Don’t worry… my love for Target is still quite strong, I was more complaining about the fact that so many “help lines” are of little to no “help” at all.
      I had heard more about Target.com’s recent problems and am just waiting patiently for ANY kind of response from their team.
      I have plans to head to the Target down the street from us this weekend so I can add a few more things in person. 🙂
      You are TOOOOO sweet (along with that little angel of yours) and thank you so much for letting me know the “inside scoop”!

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